Words and Games. Joe South wrote and released the song “Protest” in 1968 titled “The Games People Play.” The lyrics address various social and interpersonal problems that can arise between people. These include hatred, intolerance, and recklessness. One verse points at hypocrisy:
The games that people play today
Every night and all day since
Never really understanding what they are saying Now
Never clarifying what they mean.
Many of my clients in therapy suffer from similar problems. Their self-esteem, confidence, and growth in life could be severely impacted by the phrases spoken to them. Here are a few actions we can take to assist in the healing process and help them get “unstuck.”
Words and Games
- Timeframe – When were the words spoken? Hurts are often experienced during childhood when we do not have the maturity needed to process these events. Children may not speak to anyone or get help to deal with the consequences. Sometimes, words later in life are spoken out of the blue or with no thought. It is crucial to remember that you could be the sole person on earth who remembers what they said. In reality, you may never hear from the speaker next time. They could even be dead. Don’t let it happen!
- Source – Unhappy People tend to be unfriendly to people around them. People who express anger or use drugs aren’t reliable judges. People who are angry or use substances project their mistakes on others and then accuse them of doing exactly what they’re doing. If you are looking for reliable information, Find reliable sources who are healthy and knowledgeable.
- Intent – Bullies do things to lower you in their ranks. People who are traumatized can shout out with no prompting or even processing. Well-meaning people can speak in ways intended to be encouraging but have an attitude of judgment. Please take note of the reasons for the things they did to you. Do not make excuses, but instead attempt to understand the situation.
- Assumption: Did you translate things in the language? Maybe you did not understand the meaning behind it. It is essential to examine the message in the proper context and not search for meanings hidden from view. This is especially difficult when you are using text messages. Get clarification if you’re not sure.
- Truth – Once identified the messages that have brought harm, you can begin to dissect the messages. There are many times when you’ll discover that the messages were not thought through or by someone who is not an expert or was received incorrectly. What’s the truth? Write down the qualities, talents, and achievements you’ve achieved. Think about positive words and compliments from people you have met in the past.
- Repetition – Many years ago, I saw a Social Worker talk about a theory called “Big dog, little dog.” He said that the pet you feed develops. If you continue feeding your negative thoughts and thoughts, they will increase in size and become even more destructive. However, If you feed positive thoughts, words, and successes that you have achieved, you’ll see more positive outcomes. This will be beneficial in the future, too. Be yourself and say what you want to hear rather than things you don’t wish for.
It is not that people are playing an unintentional game of words they speak. Some speak without even thinking. Others have never been taught to speak clearly and in a positive way.
If you let someone else’s words hurt you, They have the power to influence your feelings. You can decide whether or not to allow them the power to influence your emotions..
And as I’ve stated numerous times before, It’s not about what happens to you, but it’s just more important, but the way you handle it!
Let go of the past, let go of thinking about the future, and live your life in peace and contentment present.
Also, remember that the words you speak can be powerful. Make sure to distribute them with kindness and respect.